How she walked those
heels were magical
Each step commanded decorum
Mouth aghast, wives clung
to their husbands in fear
A beauty without
company
A damsel
She could pass for a
fine painting by experts
A body only fit for
goddess
The reason bachelors
work to impress
Only in luck did I get
a chance to converse with her
Pity I suppose enveloped
her to listen
Yet she accompanied my
sojourn
Have I found favor or
in a trance, perhaps she was tipsy?
Bright and early my
soul surges and beside me lay the damsel
I had conquered the
world last night
An achievement worthy
of note to friends
She slept still as I
beheld her face
Alas, she was not that
damsel anymore
With the makeup had
the beauty gone
The freshness was no
more but acne
She was painted
I had been deceived
I had slept with a
figment of beauty
I had slept with
makeup
A story not fit for mention.
The part where the guy said he woke up to "acne instead of beauty," I found that line very mean. I mean come on, who do girls make up for? Certainly not for them selves. Its for those guys who will then wake up the next morning and call them ugly.
ReplyDeleteI think this piece would have been much better if instead the guy praises her natural beauty by accepting her acne and all. Then, your female readers will certainly get a boost of confidence about their beauty.
Lovely piece though. It was so good it provoked me to write what I wrote above. Your lines were great! Flowed well in one accord. I'll be reading more of your work.
Peace! Peace! Your provocation is very obvious and I appreciate you for voicing it. You would agree with me that make up has gone beyond what it used to be, we see a completely different person when not covered in foundation. I appreciate beauty and I believe ladies are endowed creatures, my heartbreak when they choose to cover their real person.
DeleteThank you so much for the comment, my brilliant writer.